Lesson 5 - Forgiving the Offender Part 1

[ * ] Forgiveness is a deliberate action of my will - out of dependence upon Christ-in-me - removing from the offender his (her) guilt toward me, giving this to God, and considering the offender no longer guilty toward me."

Who is the offender in your life? A parent? A spouse? A child? A neighbor? A co-worker? Perhaps it is only a face and the memory of hurt from someone you don't even remember, yet the hurt is there, just beneath the surface, ready to explode when a similar word is spoken, or action is taken towards you. What can we do to be free of this pain? Of our hurt, rejection, fear, anger?

Let us start by doing a very difficult thing. Let us go on a little "digging" expedition. Take a notebook and make a page with columns . . . title the columns

• HURT
• WORD / ACTION
• PERSON
• HOW IT AFFECTED ME

Now, this will take a lot of effort on your part, as we tend to stuff and try to forget, that is part of our nature (human). What we desire, here, is to reach the part of our (spirit) nature where we can be open and honest - pour out everything about the person and/or situation that you can. Allow the Lord to pour out His healing balm into your heart, as you write down your feelings. You may cry, scream, laugh, etc., it matters not . . . just do not quit. Once this list is completed we will continue on with actually learning "how" to forgive, completely and freely (even if you don't feel like it).

Look up Proverbs 24:17-18 & Romans 12:19 . . . what two things does the Lord tell us here about those who have hurt us?







Can we actually walk in these directions? No, humanly it is impossible, but with God ALL things are possible. There is only ONE who can truly hold a person accountable for the wrong that they have done, and that is the Lord. It is not our job or our responsibility to get even, or hold them accountable, but it IS a job for us to forgive them. What this does is free us! This is a hard concept to grasp, but dear ones, if you can grasp it, you can walk in total freedom in Christ Jesus and be at peace!

What does 1 Peter 2:23 & Matthew 5:25 tell us . . . ?







Do you realize that we are in bondage, heavy chains of bondage when we do not forgive? When each time we think of a thing done, a word said, something that causes us pain, or brings up anger within us, we are actually adding another link in the chain. That chain can become very, very long and heavy, the longer we carry unforgiveness in our hearts. So, this week, work on your list, be as specific as you can. Ask the Lord to help you remember things that are still inside, causing you pain, that you might not remember. Write them down, and next week we'll take the next step in becoming free.